Messy Weekend

Well there is no way to sugar coat it...Tucker responded awful to chemo Friday afternoon. Before the first bag of medicine even finished he was vomiting. Vomited several times thereafter until he had nothing left to come up, but he continued to dry heave so they gave him a cocktail of benedryl and steroids to calm his little system. It worked and helped him nap but the sickness continued friday night saturday, sunday and today. Lots of middle of the night bed and pj changes and days of keeping a bucket close by. He did not play very much he was too weak. He just laid on me like a limp noodle. As I am typing he is sleeping and I am hoping he wakes feeling stronger and able to eat dinner. They gave him extra fluids today at the Proton center to help make up what he had lost these past few days. Tucker is a tough boy, he does not complain and he hardly ever crys...but he has had enough. Today I had to wake him up exhausted to tell him it was time to go to the dr. and he immediately cried and did not want his "dingle dangle" back on, did not want to be messed with, and I do not blame him.

Chemo days are a hard dose of reality. We have become very numb to the radiation process. We had to become numb to it in order to endure it everyday. Everyone at the proton center helps it be a pretty "enjoyable" experience. We talk with other families Tucker plays before and after he gets his sticker we all leave happy that we made it another day down and go on with our day. There is nothing "enjoyable" about chemo and its effects remind you...your child has cancer. Your child is sick. It is not an experience you can become numb to. I am however going to see if maybe they can switch his nausea meds to possibly get a little better of an outcome for next treatment. Everyone knows chemo is awful, we expected that Tucker would get sick from it. It just is hard to see. The only thing keeping me from taking him and running far far away is knowing that the very thing that is making him so terribly sick is also the thing that is hopefully saving his life. Knowing God has his little hand while I hold the other helps too.

****please notice he still has a smirk after his lousy afternoon of treatment...our little superman*******


This is the probably the first post that is not too uplifting and spiritual. I have to "keep it real." Cancer is not butterflies and puppies. It doesn't give you warm feelings. I get those from God. God understands I have days that are not so positive and he doesn't expect me to act like everything is ok all the time. Hopefully everyone can respect my honesty. This weekend was awful but in time Tucker will be back to his bubbly self and that will carry us to his next treatment.

God had foresight to Tucker's trials. My parents were originally supposed to come last weekend. That didn't work out but it was best they were here during our rough weekend. They were able to give us a little break Sunday night to enjoy a dinner date while Tucker stayed at their hotel. It was much needed and appreciated and came at a perfect time. It was also wonderful to see my parents after 3 long weeks. All of us drove to St. Augustine Sunday afternoon. We got rained out of going to the beach but we ate lunch and strolled Tucker around an alligator farm. He was too weak to really get into it like he normally would have but he enjoyed getting fresh air and seeing the gators.

Our family is super excited about taking Tucker to meet Mickey this weekend at Disney World. After proton on Friday we are heading to Orlando to enjoy some FUN. Can't wait!!

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
Romans 8:28 (NIV)

3 down 3 to go

I can't believe we are half way through our treatment plan in Florida. The time is really passing quickly. Most of you know that Tucker's spinal tap came back showing cancer cells had not spread to his spinal fluid. That good news will carry us through the rest of the trip, it gave us a little pep in our step again that we so desperately needed. We give God all the glory for that good news and our ability to endure the past 3 weeks of treatment.

Tucker will get his second dose of chemo tomorrow. His radiation has not caused any major changes at this point. His skin is starting to darken in that area just a tad. He has settled in our routine and is finally taking a nap during the day again. The first 2 weeks he would not nap because everything is so different but his body needs as much rest as possible so we are so happy to see him nap again.

Last post I asked you to pray for the other children in proton with Tucker so I wanted to update you on them. The children getting treatment with Tucker now are Cruise, Jessica and another little boy that just started yesterday and I haven't met him yet. There are only 4 right now but I am almost certain more will start next week. The other children finished their treatment plan. Joseph however went home just 2 weeks into treatment due to an MRI showing that his tumor had taken over more of his brain than they felt could be fixed. They took him home to make memories. Our hearts broke for their family we continue to pray for them as they experience a parent's worst nightmare.

We have really enjoyed getting to know Jessica's parents. Jessica is 18 months old. They are our age and from the UK. We went out to eat with them tonight and it was so nice to feel "normal" for a few hours. They are a sweet sweet family.

My parents and brother are coming down Saturday. We are excited to see them. Tucker will be thrilled to see grandmee and grandpee again. We hope to go to St. Augustine Beach if Tucker feels up to it on Sunday. They have to leave Monday but at least we know we only have a few more weeks till we are HOME.

THANK YOU to everyone that have showered us with cards. We are like little kids opening presents on Christmas morning when we receive our mail. It is the highlight of our day and we truly appreciate the time people take out of their lives to make us feel special. The lady at the front desk even commented one day about how much mail we get. She said " I am amazed everyday by how much mail you get. You get more mail than anyone in this house. I tend to double check and make sure your pile is all yours." :) That just shows what loving, compassionate, generous, kind-hearted people God has blessed us with and we will be forever grateful.

Thank you for continuing to pray for Tucker's complete healing. I will update as the next weeks pass. Tucker is doing amazingly well for what his little body is going through. Most days you honestly would not even know he was sick to look at him but all the doctors around him kinda give it away. :)

"who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith--of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire--may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls" 1 Peter 1:5-9

sea world

seaworld on PhotoPeach

small victories

It is a long weekend (whoohoo!) and we are excited to celebrate surviving our first week of "our new normal." Tucker has done wonderful with his radiation...he knows the routine, has fun waving at his friends in beds next to him and enjoys putting his sticker on his chart after he is awake and ready to go home. There are 6 children getting proton there right now including Tucker. Please remember these children in your prayers as they are all battling cancer (mostly brain tumors) they are so precious it is devastating that so many babies are going through this. Their names are: Mercel, Joseph, Cruise, Luke and Gabriel.

Another reason to celebrate is that Tucker received his first round of chemo today and sat through it like a champ for 3 hours. We cuddled and watched movies. He did get sick tonight with diarrhea and vomiting but after taking his prescription for nausea he held down pretzels and sprite and played pretty normally. Hopefully tomorrow will be a good day for him. While we sat and waited for his drip to finish Tucker made his "Beads of Courage" necklace. Every patient starts with their name and then as they proceed with treatment they get a special bead for different procedures they have to endure. He will continually add beads until that beautiful day when he is in remission and he will end his necklace with a purple heart. Tucker's necklace is already pretty adorned with beads in just a month's time of procedures. It is a visual reminder of how much he has gone through and how courageous he indeed has been.

Our social worker has been working really hard to help us create ways to keep Tucker's spirits up. This week we enjoyed Jacksonville Zoo and Sunday we plan to take him to Sea World. He is so excited. Proton patients are free to visit the zoo as many times as they wish so I am sure it will be a weekly visit he is already asking to go back. Sea world offers deep discounts for families receiving medical treatment and we are so grateful that we have the opportunity to go and have a fun family day.

Next Thursday morning Tucker will be having a spinal tap before his radiation. This is to ensure that cancer cells have not spread to other parts of his spinal cord. Please help us pray that this is not the case. We pray that he has another week of successful radiation and that he continues to adjust well to his new normal. We pray for our safe travels around the city (jacksonville traffic = scary!)and peace within our hearts and minds that only God can give.

"The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him." Psalm 28:7

Gina and Kendra Tucker's recovery room nurses at the Proton Center

1st Chemo treatment

All smiles with a sucker and book when he was done!

zoo

jacksonville zoo on PhotoPeach



I apologize in advance for all the head tilting you have to do...I am too tired to rotate them all ! :)